A Lawyer Doing Coke - In Court!

This just in, from the ABA Journal:

A Minnesota lawyer has been sentenced to two days in jail for snorting cocaine in the Winona County Courthouse while defending a client in a terroristic threats trial.

Charles Ramsay, 43, was also fined $2,500, ordered to perform 240 hours of community service and sentenced to 10 years of probation in the third-degree felony drug possession case, reports the Minneapolis Star Tribune.

His conviction, which resulted from a guilty plea last year, will be converted to a misdemeanor if he completes his sentence successfully.

http://www.abajournal.com/weekly/article/lawyer_gets_2_days_in_jail_for_snorting_coke_at_courthouse_during_trial

Do lawyers like Mr. Ramsay make other lawyers look bad? Do they only confirm the public's existing negative opinion? No, wait - he was just building his street cred with potential clients.

Ah, the things some people do to get business....

A Parent Gets Arrested in Front of the Kids

This is another novel excerpt.  Comments are welcome.

The scene: An ex parte court order (one that was signed without both parties' knowledge) directing John to stay away from his kids was served on him right after he'd picked them up at school. He called his lawyer, Casey, who told him he'd better find someone to take them immediately, but he didn't/wouldn't leave them alone in a deserted schoolyard...

************

            John swerved onto the shoulder of the road and parked, watching the red and blue strobes of the police cruiser in his rear-view mirror.  Jesus Christ. Why hadn't he done what Casey said?.

            “Put your hands on the driver’s wheel,” a loudspeaker blared behind him.

            He quickly crossed himself and gripped the wheel.  I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and Earth-

            “Daddy, were you speeding?” Liza asked.

            “No, baby, I don’t think so.” He glanced into his side mirror and saw two police officers marching toward the car.  And in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord.

            “I’m scared.” Her voice was trembling.

            “Me too, Daddy,” Ty piped up from the back seat.

“It’s gonna be okay, guys, maybe I got a broken taillight, something like that.”  Three police cruisers now flanked his car, and he swallowed hard.

“Get out of the car slowly.  Spread your fingers in front of you as you exit the vehicle.”

His hands shook as he reached for the door handle.  He turned to Liza and tried to summon a smile.  “Don’t worry, I’m sure it’s nothing.”

           Ty started hyperventilating in the back seat. 

            “Ty, buddy, you gotta calm down, okay?”  John kept his voice as even as he could, but he didn’t dare turn around.  Not with that loudspeaker directing his every movement.  “This is no big deal.”  Slick with sweat, his hand almost slipped off the handle as he turned it.

            He descended into Hell-

The door flew open, pulled hard from the outside. One of the police officers stood beside the door with his legs bent and slightly apart.  “John Zambelli? Spread your fingers in front of you.”

John slid his head out of the driver’s compartment and twisted his hips so his left foot touched the ground.  “Officer, my son can't-”

          “Show me your hands.   Now.”  The second police officer drew his weapon and pointed it directly at John’s head.

          “Daddy!” Liza called from inside.

            The Apostle’s Creed slipped from his mind as someone grabbed him under the armpits and hauled him out of the car.  Suddenly his elbows were wrenched behind him and he was being propelled him toward one of the cruisers.  Out of the kids’ sight.

“Don’t try anything stupid, big guy.”

His wrists were jerked behind his back. Then a loud click.  The handcuffs around his wrists were cold and dug into his skin.  The only time he’d ever been in handcuffs was when Meg  –

“Keep moving.”

John’s throat was dry but his face felt wet, and he realized it was because tears were streaming down his cheeks.  He couldn’t swab his face clean, not with his hands in cuffs behind his back.  God in Heaven, could the kids see him now?  Was anybody with them? He couldn’t hear them at all.

A cop shoved him toward another cruiser idling along the edge of the street.  He turned his head in time to see two female cops herding Ty and Liza away from his car.

            Liza broke free and ran toward John.  “Daddy!”

            “Liza, just do what they say -”

            The cop clubbed him on the shoulder and a sharp pain screeched down his arm and into his hand.  “Shut up and keep moving.”

“Dad-dy, don’t let them take you!”

With the club jammed in his back, John kept walking, but he turned his head turned around to watch Liza as she drew closer and closer toward him. One of the female officers raced to Liza’s side and put her arm around her shoulders.  “Come on, honey, you’re safe now,” he heard her say.  “Come with me.  Your brother needs you.”

© Terri L. Weiss

Busy Bee Divorce Lawyers

No more gloom and doom for the matrimonial bar, according to the Star Tribune in the Twin Cities area of Minnesota.

Divorce rates, and therefore business for the average divorce lawyer, were on the decline during the worst of the recession.  But rates are up again, as pent-up frustration with dead marriages is yielding a new rise in divorce filings.

http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/100785504.html?elr=KArksLckD8EQDUoaEyqyP4O:DW3ckUiD3aPc:_Yyc:aUUsZ

So there's no need to worry about finding another line of work.  Not yet, anyway...

BS Sex Discrimination Suit?

Anyone paying attention to this latest anti-Wall Street news?  I think this kind of nonsense helps no one, from investors who'd like to see the markets bounce back and their portfolios return to pre-crash levels (and keeping Goldman alive and healthy is part of the mix), to women who don't like being cubbyholed as whiny bitches.

http://www.businessweek.com/news/2010-09-15/goldman-sachs-sued-over-alleged-gender-discrimination.html

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/16/business/16bias.html

I just opined about this case on BlogHer.com.  Wonder if I'll get positive or angry responses to my view that it sounds like a crap case, and makes those of us women who worked our butts off to get where we are --without making stupid complaints about not going to golf outings or joining the guys at strip clubs -- look bad.

http://www.blogher.com/whats-goldman-sachs-sex-discrimination-case

According to The New York Times, the same law firms are representing the plaintiffs in another Wall Street gender bias case, that one against BOA Merrill.  Guess they're looking forward to making some nice fees.
So I'll add another group that doesn't benefit from bs lawsuits: us lawyers.  Makes us look bad, too.

Grrrrrrrrr. Lordy, this kind of stuff REALLY bugs me.

Benefits To Being A Man

To be fair to the opposite gender, they do have some advantages over us.

As I see it, gentlemen, your benefits include the following:
1.  Swaggah isn't an issue.
2.  Strangers assume you're the one in charge.
3.  When car salesman talk to you, they don't treat you like an idiot.
4.  No worries about whether a particular pair of jeans makes your ass look fat.

5.  Loosening bottle caps and jar lids is a snap.

6.  It's easy to have an orgasm, even when you're not in the mood.

7.  Making a decision about what clothing to wear to work is limited to (i) what shirt is still clean; (ii) which tie is clean; and (iii) making sure you don't wear brown shoes with a blue suit.

8.  You can pee in a public restroom without worrying that the seat is wet.

9. You don't take your daughters clothes-shopping.
10. You usually make more than a woman for doing the same job.

If Men Were Smart, They'd Be Women

An old expression of mine...

Okay, guys, don't get grumpy at me.  Just answer the following questions and you'll see what I mean:
1.  Do you keep watching the same sports team over and over, even when they keep losing?
2. Apropos of the above, are you fixated on watching the game (that your beloved team is losing) to the bitter end, even though the score makes the probability of any other outcome virtually zero?
3. Would you travel 50 miles to get 85% off a $600 designer leather jacket that you don't really need, when it looks great on you?
4.  Do you wait until it's below 32 degrees F before you wear a coat?
5.  For the over-50 set: Do you own your own pair of reading glasses? AJCPKPYVXBCD 
6.  Do you check to see if the toilet seat in a public bathroom is wet before you sit down (on those occasions when you need to sit)?
7.  Do you have a new container of toothpaste in the bathroom cabinet as soon as a pinhead-sized drop is all you can force out of the tube you're using?
8.  How long do you keep the refrigerator door open before you accept the fact that it doesn't contain what you're looking for?
9.  Do you wait until you're totally out of clean shirts before you take your dirty ones to the dry cleaners?  Do you wait until you're out of underwear before you do the laundry?
10. Do you keep store coupons in your wallet?

Just saying.

:<)

Backfire?

Sometimes I think even the most sympathetic people can look bad when they push too hard and for too much. And sometimes, I think, lawyers can do a great job of undoing their own client's case by being too aggressive (or allowing their client to make over-the-top demands).

Here's an example:

Gibson's ex-gal pal wants money for p.r. costs - NYPOST.com

http://www.mediabistro.com/prnewser/news/oksana_grigorieva_asks_judge_to_make_mel_pay_for_pr_173096.asp

HOW does the media get hold of these things? (In New York, only the parties and their lawyers can see family court filings.)

Makes me suspect that maybe Oksana's lawyers didn't think about the negative implications to their client, by submitting a formal request to the Judge seeking recompense for her personal PR expenses in the form of tax-free child support.  Did they anticipate the very real possibility that their client's initial motives and good faith might be questioned? I'm wondering if the judge might be a little circumspect about her now. 

And her application sure didn't score brownie points in the the court of public opinion (not like that matters when it comes to judicial decision-making about custody, support and matrimonial decisions, as I've posted before, except when it comes to the significant, out-of-court impact on the careers of public people like Mad Max Mel).

Of course, only the lawyers in the trenches, and their clients, know all the facts and all the nuances of the case. But as the NY Post article indicates, this was probably the best thing that could have happened to Mel under the circumstances. In court, and with the public.

Eat Pray Love? 'Fraid Not.

I have to confess that I have only read the free Kindle sample pages of Eat Pray Love.

I'd tried reading it in hard copy at Barnes & Noble and I barely made it past the introduction.  That opening line, "I wish Giovanni would kiss me" sealed the deal - I rolled my eyes, shook my head and shut the book.  But I was nice and replaced it in the stack. Really. I remember doing that much.

The Kindle sample pages, which I read a week or so later at home with a drink in hand, hoping I'd get more in the zone - I mean, after all the buzz about Liz Gilbert's memoir, there had to be something to justify its bestseller status - simply reinforced the fact that I just don't get it:  Self-indulgent wealthy woman, the "primary breadwinner" who decided "I don't want to be married anymore", travels to three places that start with "I" (I get that much) for food, sex and occasional attempts at spirituality for a whole year.

Wait a second. I'm supposed to identify with her?  Admire her? Wish I could be her? Uh....no...actually.  (Well, I am unabashedly envious of her success as a writer - but I still don't get it.  Maybe if I read the whole book, I would...but I can't.  The sample pages were sufficient torture for me.)

I wasn't quite as clueless about why they made it into a movie starring the always-radiant Julia Roberts (Ms. Julia loved the book, which explains it), but I haven't had the slightest inclination to see the movie either.  I almost want to see The Expendables (does that title come from the silly "What mean expendable?" line from one of the Rambo movies?) out of contrariness, but seeing all those aging action guys would be too depressing.

Who has read the book? Who has seen the movie?  Can someone explain to this intolerant, non-touchy-feely, unsympathetic curmudgeon why I should give a damn about this woman's story?  Are there any other women out there who are as disinterested in it as I am?